Finally, some good fucking games. Metal: Hellsinger, is filling the void in my heart and dick since Saints Row (2022) left me unsatisfied last month. While its length leaves a little to be desired, its girth, meat'n'bones makes up for it. Metal colon Hellsinger puts a spin on the genre I'm going to refer to as the Hell shooter, this game is what could be called a Rhythm Bullet Hell Metal Slaughter Bukakke, copyright pending. It's a first person action game that blends music perfectly into gameplay, and is firmly in the Recommend category, especially if you are a fellow headbanger.
The story revolves around a demon whose had her voice taken, by a head demon referred to as the Judge, and she wants it back. With your Angel Gun Skull friend, the narrator, you venture through hell fighting the Judge's aspects, while beating off entire horny legions of twisted demons. Culminating in the final confrontation with the Judge, in which you regain your voice. Then, much like that double-sider you keep hidden under your mattress, where one story ends, another begins, and the crowned Hellsinger sets off to assault Heaven. Which is probably just a set up either for DLC or a sequel, either way, I'm on board. As said, it's not a very long game, thus that's really about all there is for the story, fret not, the gameplay and soundtrack is where the real fun is.
Rhythmic Combat
Truthfully, much like how you used drugs to finally get that three way two years ago, it's all just pretense for the ensuing raging hot action. This game exists so you can slaughter the shit out of demons in hell while listening to custom tailored metal, featuring some of the biggest names in metal. You might be thinking to yourself, “Damn, that chick at the grocery store was fine as hell.” You may also be thinking, “that sounds a lot like Doom.” You'd be right in that thought, there is a twist however, in that this game rewards you for being on time with the song in your action. Timing shots with the beat of the song increases damage substantially as well as amplifying the bass drum notes in a very satisfying way, and being on time consistently adds x2, x4, x8, and x16 multipliers, for both damage and score. Taking damage, or miss timing shots decreases the multiplier. You have your choice of 6 weapons, each with their own satisfying feel that works to the tempo, 8 Hells (levels) and 21 Torments (challenge scenarios). While the Hells feel somewhat formulaic, they still manage to be fun, like routine scheduled baby-making sex. The Torments on the other hand, can be fun and satisfying, but can also be smash your keyboard frustrating. Though, that frustration only makes it more satisfying when you finally do beat it, especially when some require you to be near perfect, which is a victory in itself when playing. Replayability comes from the scoring system, influenced by those multipliers and ending screen performance stats, global leader boards, and also just from the fact that the game is fun as hell.
While the game is a bit short itself, it more than makes up for it in gameplay. This game does one thing and it does it well, fast paced action with metal intertwined into gameplay, on the backdrop of Hell, it's every metal heads wet dream. It's a game I can definitely see myself coming back to from time to time to have some demon slaughtering fun. It is for all those reasons that the game garners a solid rating of 9 out of 10, Excellent.